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Is it selfish to go for what you want?

Whenever I start talking to clients about what they dream of having it tends to go either of two ways. Either they get really excited to be in a space where ether can finally brainstorm freely around what they really want. Or they get very hesitant as they are not used to sharing what they really want with anyone.

Based on the thousands of conversations I’ve had with expats I’ve started to see a bit of a pattern emerge. It seems that many of them have at some point experienced shame and/or been accused of being selfish to follow their dream.

Now, first things first. Everyone in this world is doing the best that they can with what they know. If dreaming big and setting goals for your future is something you do quite naturally, you might not understand people who don’t. Then there are also people who really don’t know what it is that they want, and the times they do know, they struggle to share it with others.

That’s why I wanted to bring up the key destination of of today’s post. It’s not selfish to follow the dreams that you have. Other people might very well have opinions about what you choose to do, but that often comes from a space of them thinking that they know what’s best for you. Remember that their comments and advise do come from a place of love (even if it might not always feel that way). But this is where your own need for certainty comes in. Because you’ve got this.

If you want to go exploring or doing something way outside of your current comfort zone, it’s certainly not selfish to do so. Maybe rather than using the word selfish, we could choose to say that it’s about being committed to self. Staying true to self balance and self worth. That you are choosing to keep the promises you make to yourself.

Of course we need to be respectful of other people in our walk through life. But not respectful to the point where we don’t follow what we desire, just because someone else thinks it’s selfish to do so. If anything, how selfish is it to hold someone else back from what they want just because we think they shouldn’t do it? 🙂